The Mind that creates a problem is not the same that will create the result except when changed. How simple and short is this?
However how mundane can the details behind this be.
I remembered when I was unfulfilled with the point I was in my life. This was some few years ago. It was not because I couldn’t afford my personal care or that I lacked basic needs of life. In fact, I could boast that my health was way above the average but of course could get better. To a reasonable point I was hale and hearty. Physically, I seemed fit but how about mentally?
Let me introduce to you one of the best overthinkers the universe had produced. As at the time I am talking about, a thousand thoughts could cross my mind in just a few minutes. Of course, I know that the mind has no other job than to create thoughts, but at least could these thoughts be harmonised and stop causing me trouble like a headache, a racing heart, and a pounding chest? Could it come silently and go silently? Could it leave me alone and allow me to go through my daily works without distraction? Could it allow me the right focus on the task at hand? Could it let me create the life that I truly desired? A perfect example of the monkey mind playing games with mine.
I wish I knew the answers to all of this earlier I probably would not have fallen into a suicidal anxiety. Now you want to know more I presume, and yes, I will tell you.
Let me re-join from my first statement where I said the mind that creates a problem is not the same one that will create the solution except it changes. The change I needed the most in my life was the ability to get in control of my thoughts.
Whilst no human being can’t control the functionality mind as its only work is to produce thoughts with 60,000 of those produced in a day, we can however be in perfect control of our thoughts and create a life that we desire with this simple skill of mind and self-mastery. The same one that saved me from suicidal anxiety, broke me free of everything fear, got me clarity on my life’s true purpose and helping me live fulfilled at the moment.
The state of the mind is a key player to who you become and what you do. This cannot be overemphasised. In fact, to know this and play from here, is to know PEACE.
Seventeen years ago, the shocking news of a loving uncle of mine who lived with my family came through. He had left home to holiday in my hometown as he would sometimes do, but this time only to receive a news, some few days after that he had given up the ghost following a brief illness. In fact, as brief as two to three days. It was about the period of my final year secondary school certificate examination. My family and I travelled home for his burial. I was quite broken to see his body covered in sand and that was goodbye to Baba as we all fondly called him.
Few days before my exams will commence, I had gone to the dentist for a tooth surgery following an excruciating pain from a decayed molar tooth. I was recovering and was also preparing for my secondary school leaving certificate exam known as SSCE. I had falling into a panic two nights before my first paper. I was put under medical check during the exam which meant series of medical exams conducted on me with all the result coming back okay and therefore there was no diagnosis of any kind. I lost appetite, weight and became emaciated. Worse still, I lost sleep. I managed to go through my papers from the hospital to the exam hall often.
As there was no traceable diagnosis and my condition got worse, my family was advised to seek non-medical means of healing which meant that we visited clerics and traditional healer many of whom said I was under spiritual attack. My panic soon got worse that my family and I thought I was going to die. If you are wondering what panic may mean, I am happy to shed more light. What I experienced was a very high pulse, pounding heart, profuse sweating accompanied by trembling body and worse of all was a quite high blood pressure, you can imagine what would make a 16years old present with a high blood pressure. All of these symptoms often strikes after sunset and worsened as bedtime drew nearer. Of course, it was Anxiety and this I didn’t know for many years until another 15years after when all of the same symptoms presented yet again and this time with a terrible insomnia that got me suicidal.
I had been diagnosed by a renowned Psychiatrist of having General Anxiety Disorder with mood disorder emanating from it. I remembered vividly the most prominent thoughts of my disturbed mind at that time was that I was going to die soon. I kept listening to the inner voice and accepting it and as it got worse in my mind, I got worse in my health. Months soon passed and my condition got worse that I was placed under anti-depressant all of which made me more unhappy to think that I could only catch sleep with pills and to think that I could not go through my daily activities as I used to.
I was now withdrawn from anyone and everyone. My libido plummeted. I felt bland. My mind, body and soul were now in conflict with one another. I struggled for inner harmony. I had lost hope, I was tired and frustrated, I had attended my own funeral in my mind. I cried my eyes out as though It was real. I soon was tired of crying and now it seemed like some of kind of psychosis had set in.
Modupeoriyomi is my middle name and that soon came to my rescue as I found a non-medical method and self-study group that soon walked me out of anxiety and weeks after that, I bounced back gradually from the world beyond into a new reality.
The fog in my head is long gone, I am fully aware of the condition, causes, diagnosis, prevalence and the sustainable non-medical recovery treatment which is sustainable because it didn’t fail me nor anyone, I have trained using it. Most importantly, I am not only aware of anxiety and depression, I am also self-aware of how this can be a great block to living fulfilled and fully expressed in this sweet world.
What a time to be alive. A time where I am aware of a bigger mind than mine. I am talking about the universal mind, the mind of the creator, the mind of God which is in me, around me and serves me now.
With Nigeria being the 7th largest country in the world, having the highest caseload of Depression in Africa and 15th highest Suicide case in the world as reported by World health organisation, there is no better time than now to stand up for my people and bring the numbers down to the bearest minimum one person a time, one group a time to Become Conscious in a Distracted world.
SAKIRAT OKEWOLE (Growth Coach and Mental Health Awareness Expert)